God grant me the Serenity to
accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time.
Enjoying one moment at a time.
Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will
That I may be reasonably happy in this life, and
Supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen.
- REINHOLD NIEBUHR[1]
As I write on this twenty-eighth day of March, in the year 2020, enormous populations of the world are in lockdown. Someone has hit the “pause” button. We’re on hold, stuck in our homes, waiting for the coronavirus known as COVID-19 to die. We are told to practice “social distancing,” keeping six feet or more between ourselves and others to help stop the virus’ spread. Such measures are vital because COVID-19 (as with any virus) cannot live without a host.
I’m no microbiologist, and to those of you who know more about it than I do, I apologize for any oversimplification. But as I understand it, a virus is not really a living organism. A virus is a pretender. It seems like a life form because it has DNA or RNA strands and it reproduces itself. But it cannot live or reproduce without a host—without a human (or animal) from whom it hijacks cell metabolism and genetic material. Without a participating host, COVID-19 dies.
Other social ills require our participation, too, like gossip, slander, envy, strife, deceit, maliciousness, boasting, insolence, pride, ruthlessness, heartlessness (see Romans 1:28-31). These spiritual viruses spread between people when we fail to maintain spiritual hygiene. That is, when we fail to confess our sins (1 John 1:9) and be washed by “water and the Word” of God (Ephesians 5:26).
With everything that is routine and familiar suddenly put on hold, many of us are faced with ourselves and our thoughts and emotions in ways we haven’t been for a long time. The American way of life is hectic, busy, and extraverted. We don’t always notice or give much thought to gossip or envy or pride, like we don’t overly concern ourselves with the common cold or seasonal flu. We accept the common cold, and we accept that it’s okay to gossip, slander, envy, etc. Who’s got time to reflect or apologize or do a spiritual hand-washing?
But now, suddenly, our extraverted, hectic way of life has come to a screeching halt. Many of us are suddenly and involuntarily not “busy,” and we cannot even claim to be. So how are we really? How are you?
Some of us are resting, truly at peace. I am most of the time. I am an introverted person who likes it quiet. I don’t care for busy or hectic. My personal lifestyle is kind of un-American. For introverts like me, this involuntary pause feels like a welcome break from the typical hustle and bustle. The American way of life is much more centered around the extravert—the person who loves social interaction and thrives on the presence of people. Introverts have been coping with this society/personality misfit all their lives. Suddenly, though, the tables have turned, and it is the extraverts who must adjust to a “socially distanced” world. Introverts are resting. Recharging. Even thriving.
Unless they are giving in to fear. Panic instead of peace and rest is always an option, no matter what your personality tendencies. Times are uncertain. We don’t know how long this lockdown will last. We don’t know how long our supply of toilet paper will last. No one knows how bad it may get. We don’t necessarily know how to live with lack. Our sense of control and certainty has been pulled out from under us, and we’re unsettled, to say the least. So how are you reacting? How are you doing with the uncertainty?
In the face of anxiety, uncertainty, or threat, the predictable human reaction is to assert control. We want to feel like we’re in control in some way, and when we feel out of control in one area, we’ll look to exert control in other areas. These days, I’m thinking about the fear-control connection like this: Fear hosts control. Like an immuno-compromised body, the more afraid we are, the more our need for control runs rampant. Can you see it in yourself or others? Rules. Regulations. Stay-at-home orders. Closed borders. Hand-washing police. Gossip. Slander. Maliciousness. Pride. Such things are attempts at physical or emotional control. Problem is, they do very little to address the underlying cause of our fear.
Fear-based control is a virus, a pretender. It mimics in some ways our natural, God-given need to exercise autonomy, free-will. We do have choices to make. Even though we didn’t choose to be on lockdown, we still can control what time we get out of bed, whether or not we shower and dress for the day, whether we try to be productive at something while we’re home, or whether instead we will binge on Netflix till it’s over. We have control over a lot of things, still, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.
In your own life, can you tell the difference between fear-based control and the God-given exercise of free will? It’s not always easy to tell. Hence the serenity prayer. Here it is again:
God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time.
Enjoying one moment at a time.
Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will
That I may be reasonably happy in this life, and
Supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen.
If you have been tempted to let your emotions and fear get the better of you, let me encourage you to pray the serenity prayer every day for as long as necessary. Ask for peace. Ask for grace. Ask for courage to do your part—what you can do to stop the spread of the virus. But also ask for the courage and grace to stop hosting fear, control, gossip, slander, pride, etc. These spiritual ills are deadlier than COVID-19. Ask for an increase of spiritual health. Confess what needs confessing, and spend lots of time with the God of love who promises never to leave or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).
Jesus said, “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life.” If you want to live, you must have Jesus, God’s Son. His perfect and complete love dispels fear (1 John 4:18). Love boosts your spiritual immunity; fear and control cannot remain in the presence of perfect love. So, in your prayer times, ask and keep on asking for love. For life. For the peace that passes understanding (Philippians 4:7). For serenity in the face of uncertainty. For courage to do what you can and grace to trust the God of love. Let us accept this current “hardship as the pathway to peace.” Let us surrender and be surprised by joy and serenity in the time of coronavirus.
[1] Origin of the Serenity Prayer: A Historical Paper. (n.d.). https://www.aa.org/assets/en_us/smf-129_en.pdf
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